A Path for Me

As a young girl growing up, I have seen and been through a lot of things. I have met a lot of different characters and have been to a lot of different places. Going through all of these different changes I knew one thing was for certain, my big sister was always there with me, and it was Tiffany and Timeka against the world.

It all started when I was about one maybe one and a half, my grandma (which was actually my great-aunt) got custody of me and my big sister since my mother couldn’t care for us. My grandma’s name was Bernadine; she moved me and my sister from a raggedy apartment on the south side of Chicago to a beautiful 3 bedroom 2 bathroom house in the southern suburb Calumet City. We had two cousins that we were very close to named Shannyn and Shaina. They are older than us by a few years, but we played together as if we were the same age. Bernadine was actually their grandmother, but since she raised me and my sister we called her grandma too.

As the years went by my grandmother fell sick; she had breast cancer. She was doing really well with staying healthy for a while, but when me and my sister turned about 8 and 10 she fell sick again apparently she was on the wrong chemotherapy. My grandma was so sick she could not walk and she lost strength in her arms to, she was no longer able to care for herself. At the age of 11, I took on the responsibility of caring for her. I loved her more than anything in the world and I would do whatever she asked of me.

I would wake up in the morning, get dressed, and off to school I went. As soon as the bell rang at 2:25 pm, I would rush to my locker to gather my belongings and would rush home (also so I wouldn’t get caught up in the after school madness with the other kids) to be with my grandma. After about two years of that, my grandmother’s daughter (her name’s Demetra), felt as if caring for my grandmother was too much responsibility for me and my sister, so she allowed us all to move into her house where my grandma would have more help. So now we’ve moved from Calumet City to Glenwood and I was in the 6^th grade. I didn’t want to move. I don’t really like change, but I had to I transferred from Dirksen Middle School to Brookwood Middle School. All the kids there were different from me, I noticed instantly they dressed different; they talked different; they were very polite. I instantly felt as if I wasn’t going to fit in. I stayed there and finished out my 6^th grade year and over time I met new people and actually made some friends.

However, we moved again. This time it was to the next city over called Chicago Heights. I had to transfer again, but this time it was my 7^th grade year. I now went to Parker Junior High. Just like at Brookwood it took me a while to adjust. Eventually, I did and actually even liked it there. By this time I was about 12 and me, my sister, and my cousin Shannyn have come up with a plan to have shifts to help out our grandma. We did days, so Shannyn would be Monday, me Tuesday, and my sister Timeka Wednesday and we repeated through the week. So one Wednesday it was my sister’s shift to care for my grandma and since I didn’t have to I decided to go out to the park down the street with a few friends from school. So, we’re playing as usual and having a good time and we hear a horn honk. Everyone turned to look to see who it was and it was my sister. She had took the keys to my cousin Demetras truck and came up to the park. As kids we weren’t aware what was wrong with that situation, we were just so excited to hop in. As we all hoped in my sister decided she wanted to press the gas and make a left turn over the curb going into the parking lot.  That’s when everything went sideways. We flipped! Everyone crawled out of the broken windows; nobody was seriously hurt, thank god! But that’s when we had come back to the reality of the situation. I was scared of what was going to happen to my sister and myself because everything she did, people always assumed I knew because we were close but that was not always the case. I ran home crying to tell them what had happened and they all rushed down to park to see. Demetra was mad and Shaina wanted to fight. My sister went to the hospital, then afterward to jail for grand theft auto, since she was only 15 my aunt Kenya was able to bail her out so she only stayed there a few hours for processing, but it took all night to get released. I was sad I hadn’t seen my big sister in a whole 24 hours. By the time she got out the next day, I had already been moved to the west side of Chicago with my aunt Kenya, yes they put me out for what my sister did. My aunt went and got my sister and we stayed with her a while.

When my sister finally got to me, I was so happy that I started to cry because I hadn’t seen her since the accident and now I knew she was ok. At this point, I was half way through my 8^th grade year when I transferred to McNair. It was cool, but these kids were way different, they were mean. I wasn’t use to it but I had to adjust. Once I fully adjusted and made friends my sister caused mischief with my aunt and she put us out. We weren’t so upset she did though we didn’t really like the area anyway. So we moved in my great aunt Bernadine’s sister, my great aunt Murilene. At this point in my life I only have a few months left of 8^th grade I transferred back to Dirksen Middle School in Calumet City because that’s where we moved to when we left my aunt Kenya’s house out west, but by the time graduation had approached I wasn’t ready because I had learned three different curriculums, so I was behind a bit.

We stayed with my great aunt though it wasn’t until I was ready to be on my own that I left from with her. The process had greatly impacted my life though, because after all that I was never able to catch back up in school. I was always behind the rest of my peers that hints to the fact that today I am preparing myself for the GED. It held me back from school for a while I didn’t want to go back ever once I was through but I have to do what I have to do to be a better me today, and I can’t let my past determine my future I see better, and I will be better.

The lesson I learned is to follow the path for me. No matter how much I love my sister I can’t be willing to waste drop what’s important to me to always run behind her. I have also learned to speak up, if I see something is going to have a terrible ending I don’t wait around for it to happen. Since all of this happened I follow a new motto. If ever anyone asks me to do anything I’m uncomfortable with I ask myself first “would they do it for me?”

Lesson in Life

One important lesson I have learned that could help someone else is that education is the key to a good life.  I had a druggy mom and dad that did not go to school and so education was not important in my home. So when the people around you are not pushing you, it has to be on you to do it for yourself.  So it had to be on me to do it.

However, at 20 I had a baby and when the baby started school and I couldn’t help her with homework that made me feel bad. I needed to get some help for her. Because I could not read at that point, I realized how important it is to learn to read and went back to school. With so much going on in my life so that I could not keep going on every day the way I had been. I went to put in an application and had to ask someone to help me fill out the papers. The first time I asked someone to help I was so afraid that someone would find out my secret and talk about me.  

Don’t let the world around you come between you and your education. The big lesson I have learned in my life is education is the key having a good life.  Learning to read is the most important thing you can do for your life. Do not be afraid to ask someone for help if you need it. So, the best thing you can do is get your education. It is your life and you have to live it!

A Young Child Growing Up

As I was growing up there were eight of us in the house and my mother took care of us all by herself. I was the second child. When she took us to school, she stayed there the whole day volunteering in the school until it was time for us to get out.

When I was in second grade I stopped doing my school work, because I didn’t like going to school; so I would just sit there. I was not doing my class assignment work until my mother came to volunteer in my class. Then I would start doing it because I knew she was there. I learned when I was going to school that I didn’t know how to read or spell, so my mother used to have me to read books ever night for 30 min until I would understand what the words meant. I learned how to take my time.

            One thing I have learned is that I should have stayed in school when I was young, because I see that it was easier for me to learn when I was younger and my mom was there to help. When I was growing up I didn’t have to worry about my mother taking care of all eight of her children. She didn’t have to worry about finding a babysitter like I do now.  It’s going to be hard for people. You will have to pay more money for everything you want. Therefore, you should stay in school till you reach your goal. So that in the future you will have the things you need to live off of in life. So I will make it everything and the world to give my G.E.D. So once you start going to school, stick with it until you get your diploma or GED.

A Young Girl's Lesson

Annie, a little girl, the oldest of eleven children, lived in a house on Douglas and Homan in the city of Chicago with her family. She lived with her grandma, grandpa, mom, and her seven brothers, and four sisters. It was in a nice neighborhood with lots of churches and stores. The people in the neighborhood were very friendly. With her big family and nice neighbors, there was never a dull moment. As she began to get older going to school was getting harder, because Annie had to babysit her sisters and brothers. As time went by, her mom would get sick, and she had to tend to her sisters and brothers. She started to hang out with girls that were different than the way she was raised. They even dressed different than the way she did. Wanting to be accepted, by her peers, she started to hang out with them.

She felt like she was being too protected by her parents, so she left home and her mom was very angry! She looked to her friends as her second sisters and brothers then she started to like boys. She wanted to be accepted by her peers. That changed everything when she visited home to see her mama. There were lots of arguments. She turned to a boyfriend for comfort only to find out that he could not solve her problems. She ended up getting pregnant, first problem. Second problem was that she had to have baby’s pampers, milk and clothing. Her mother still needed help with Annie’s brothers and sisters. She still needed Annie’s help with dressing and feeding them, so Annie decided to go back home.

No matter what was going on, Annie’s mama said she understood that it was hard to go to school with helping her, but she that must still try to go. Her mother said that when she was a child her parents needed her to help by going to work in the field to pick cotton, so she did not have a chance to go to school. She wanted Annie to not to have a hard life like that, because she had to work in the fields, going to the white people’s houses to clean. Annie’s mother made her feel bad about having a baby so young. She said she needed Annie’s help sometimes, but never intended for her to stop going to school. By not listening, Annie found herself working, taking care of two children, and a home. When she finally realized what she was saying the damage was done, but what she said was still true. Now Annie had a chance to talk to other young girls who are at home with their moms and want to finish school.

Finally, she wanted young people to know that there are many things that can get in the way when trying to go school, but don’t stop trying to get a career in some field to support you. Mama influenced Annie to keep trying even though many people have told her she should give up. She now has enrolled in a Garfield Learning Center.  Influenced by her mother, with the help of many good teachers has made her feel better about her life. The staff at Family Start Learning Center has helped her with my reading, writing, and math.

The Right Thing to do

My name is Sheketa and I attend school at 10 S. Kedzie. I am going to school to get my GED diploma. I live across the street from my school. I have two teachers there. One of my teachers, who teaches math, is named Mr. Nathan. My other teacher’s name is Ms. Rachael; she’s my reading teacher. I have great classmates. One of my classmate’s name is Mr. Grandberry. Mr. Grandberry and I had a little altercation while answering a question Ms. Rachael had asked the classroom. He lives here in Chicago and is a great student. Things kind of got off on the wrong foot with us that day.

                Ms. Rachael decided to ask us questions about the book, The Kite Runner, we were reading in class. I was anxious to answer before she could call on someone else. I wanted to be the first to answer the question, so I yelled out the answer to the question. She replied and said, “no I want Mr. Grandberry to give me the answer”. I got mad and got out my chair and walked out of the classroom while mumbling mean words.

                When I left out the classroom, I went to sit in the office. I needed to go calm down from how angry I was. Ms. Rachael came in 5 minutes later and sat next to me. She asked me if I wanted to talk about what had happened. I replied, “no, not really.” Then she said, “Maybe you need some time to yourself to be alone”; I agreed. When she walked out to go back to the classroom, I realized deep down I really did want to talk. I had seen that she had cared. After I had a talk with Ms. Gwen (the lady in the office who always sat at the front desk) I felt a little better. I had learned that it’s always good to talk to someone about a situation that is bothering you. It helps you feel better. So, the next day, I came to school feeling much better. I couldn’t wait to see my teacher to apologize to her for how I reacted. When I saw Ms. Rachael, I apologized to her in front of the whole class. She said thank you Sheketa that was nice. Also, later that afternoon, my classmate Mr. Grandberry apologized to me. He said “he apologizes if he made me angry and that he wasn’t trying to make me feel bad”. I told him “thank you Grandberry, it’s ok.”

The most important lesson that I have learned that could help someone else is to always talk about your problems. This would help others if they are in a situation like this, if they are having problems with someone and need to talk about what happened. This was an important lesson that I have learned that can really help someone else.

Update! New writing coming soon!

Hello Readers,

We have a new batch of student writing that will be published this week. Students have been working on personal narratives on the topic, "what is a lesson that you learned that could help someone else." The students have completed at least 3 drafts of these narratives! I hope you enjoy.

New Neighborhood Transitions

Hey, my name is Ivory. A lot of interesting things have happened in my 17 years of living, but when I was about 10, things got interesting.

            When I moved to 42^nd and Campbell I was mad because I didn’t want to move, I preferred my old neighborhood and friends. Anyways, my mom, her husband and I moved to the southwest side of Chicago. I was surrounded by people I didn’t know. I was a very friendly and kind little girl, and thought it would be a piece of cake to make new friends. Boy was I wrong.

            I started my first day of school the next day. I walked into my new class and all of the kids kept whispering. I ignored them, and walked to the teacher’s desk. “Are you the new student?” The teacher asked. “Yes ma’am, where can I sit?” She pointed to an empty desk next to this girl named Samantha. The other kids continued whispering. I introduced myself to Samantha.

            “Hi, I’m Ivory. Ms. Filakowski already told me your name was Samantha?” She looked at me and smiled. “Yes it is, nice to meet you. Do you want to sit with me in lunch?” I shook my head yes and smiled. I was happy that I’d made a new friend. As the day went on, I became irritated. All the kids except for Samantha were so racist. One boy even called me an N-Head! Who does that? I decided not to let it get to me.  I’d dealt with racism before, so it wasn’t a big deal to me.

            Anyway, Sam and I were calling each other best friends ever since my second day at my new school, and she’d invited me to her birthday party while we were in lunch. I knew my mom would let me go, so after school I called her from Sam’s cell phone. She was so lucky; I didn’t even own a house phone! However, both my mom and step dad had cell phones. What did I have? I had my thumb and pinky to make a pretend phone. When I spoke to my mom she told me I could go, so we jumped up and down squealing and screaming.

            Two days later, my mom had walked me to Sam’s house. I’d bought her ten different nail polishes, mascara, eye liner, and an Aeropostale outfit. Before we walked into Sam’s house, I looked at my mom. “What?!” I gave her a pleading look. “Mom, please don’t walk me all the way in, it’s not cool!” She looked at me as if I had snakes for hair. “Child, I don’t know this lady! I’m coming in or we’re going home.” I huffed and puffed and agreed. I was glad I did though, because I ended up needing her.

            When we walked in, Sam’s mom greeted us at the door. She led me to Sam’s room and her and my mom walked to the kitchen. When I opened Sam’s bedroom door, I saw the twins Layla and Fatima. I stared hard at the twins like I wanted to punch them. They were always being mean, they were always calling me names because I was African American, and they thought they were better because they were Hispanic. Samantha knew I had an issue with them. I thought to myself, why would she invite them knowing I didn’t like them?

            I went up to her, gave her the gifts and hugged her. I wished her a happy birthday as she began to introduce me to the twins. “Ivory, this is Layla and Fatima, guys, this is Ivory.” They just waved a hand at me, as if they were dismissing me. I felt anger boil inside of me, but it was Sam’s birthday so I had to behave myself. An hour into the party, Fatima made a bell noise. Then, all heck broke loose.

            “Peasant Ivory!” Fatima yelled. They all began to laugh, including Samantha. I looked at her with pure hurt in my eyes. Then, out of nowhere, I felt something going around my neck, and I began to freak out. While swinging my arms and legs everywhere, I think I hit someone because I heard a scream. “HANG THE N-WORD!” I heard one of the twins yell. I yelled at her, hit her, and then I hit Sam. I ran out the room and cried on my mom’s lap. “What’s wrong?” She asked. I just shook my head and didn’t say a word. My mother still doesn’t know what happened to this day. When we got home, I crawled into bed and cried myself to sleep. This is why I never, ever want friends again.

First Plane Ride

My friend called me and asked me if I wanted to come to Alabama for the weekend with him. I said yes. So I packed my bag and I told my sons that I was leaving for the weekend. I was in such a hurry I didn't pack very well, so I headed out the door. Before I could get out the door the lady that I was meeting at the airport was calling me every minute. I guess she wanted me to get there on time so I wouldn't miss my flight. When I got to the train station she called me again. I told her I was on the train already. When I got to the airport I didn't see her so I called her to see where she was, and I found her right away. So we hugged each other. We got something to eat before it’s time to get on the plane. When we got to security I didn't like taking off my shoes or belt. It was my first time riding on a plane. I was scared and excited. I didn’t know that I was getting on the plane. I thought I was going through a hallway until I saw the pilot in the window. Then I saw all the seats and people were sitting in their seats.  I got to my seat and sat down by this man. He knew I was nervous so he bought me a drink. He said, “You look like you needed a drink.” I said, “Yes thank you very much.” So we talked for two hours all the way there. He was very nice to me. He said, “It’s not that bad. Don’t think about you up in the air. Just think about you driving a car.” I got very relaxed after drinking and talking to him, and before I knew it we were landing in Alabama. Then we called our friend to come and pick us up at the airport. I was glad to see my friend. He gave me a hug and a kiss. Since I flew now I’m not scared to fly. Actually, I want to go somewhere else on a plane, maybe Vegas.

Denise

Shifting Opinions

There was a time when I shifted my opinion of someone when I relocated to a new building. I met this girl; her name was Shay. Shay was about 5’6” tall and weighed about 290 pound. I used to always talk to her. We used to go out places just her and me. We used to talk about a lot of stuff, like how I was doing in school and how was my day and I would ask her the same things like, how was work. Until one day Shay and I went out to eat and she was talking about people and I didn’t like that. And what made it so bad was that she would be talking with food in her mouth and being overdramatic. So, I let her know it’s not a good thing to talk about people. So, she got mad. She was so mad that we stopped talking to each other. I don’t think she can talk about anyone because she has an ill heart. Eventually, Shay and I started to talk again. I asked her, “Do you want to take the kids out to eat?” Shay would ask, “where will we be going out to eat?” She wouldn’t respond right away and instead would say, “I will let you know,” but that would never happen. I would just go out on my own without letting her know. Later, Shay would angrily say, “why didn’t you tell me?” I would respond with a big beautiful smile, but now I don’t offer to let her go out to enjoy the beautiful city with my kids and me.     

Nakevia

Learning to Ask Questions

Being a good student is not easy, but very important, and coming to school as many days as possible helps in order to keep up with the homework and the different assignments that the teachers may give out. There will be many assignments, but I must try hard not to get too far behind. It will be very hard to catch up. It’s not easy to have to keep starting over by waiting for the next six weeks to begin again. To be a good student, I had to ask for help from my teachers and the social workers. When I first decided to finish school it was very hard. I was ashamed at first to ask a question, but now I ask for help if I have a problem with a particular subject. That was the struggle I overcame.

I had to work in order to help take care of my children. Then, I had to manage a home and go to school, that’s three jobs! It was not easy being away from my family when I was working. However, I needed money, and I needed my education. I have started and stopped many times, because of work or family problems. I had to start learning all over again in order to read, write and do math problems. My academic struggles with math, even though it was not easy, in the end made me more confident about learning. One particular problem was renaming fractions. Renaming fractions have many different steps in order to solve the problem. I had to do it many times before I understood it. In addition, I had lots of help from my teachers. My teacher, Mr. Nathan, asked me to show him on the board step by step the way to do the problem of renaming fractions, so that he would know whether I understood it. I showed him that I could do the problem and he said, “That’s good.”  What I learned about a lot of problems solving, be it math, writing or any other academic problem, and was that sometimes the subject must be repeated many times. I learned that if I asked for help when I needed, I would get the help I need.

I continued to try. Each time I started again it was hard, but I also noticed that my academic struggle had gotten lighter. The help that I received from my teachers and social workers has helped me to continue. Asking my teacher more about the subjects that I need to learn has changed my habits from the way I used to learn. My desire for learning is much stronger. Right now, I am dealing with learning how to write better, like doing book reports and writing assays on different subjects. The struggle goes on in the academic field of learning. I will have to muster up some strength in order to get my GED.

In conclusion, to be a better student you cannot be ashamed to ask the teacher or the social workers for help with the problems you may have. If you are patient, your teachers will help; that’s what they’re there for. If you have a personal problem the social workers will help you with that, they are there to listen. Finishing assignments, coming to school on time, and doing your homework will help with being a good student.

Annie

The Deep Love of a Mother and Her Child (Evan's Story)

My grandmother was my care provider for nine years, because my mother was always on drugs that played a big part in my life growing up. I was a teen mom at the age of 15. My grandmother gave me up to DCFS at the age of 13. I don’t have any family support that really cares about me and my son. I was homeless for ten years, in my life. Going place to place, some nights I didn’t have any food to eat. I slept in abandoned buildings, cold cars and even on the train. No one really cared about me at all. I have always been alone to fight all my battles. I never wanted any sympathy for my situation; I just wanted a support system and love.

Evan, my first son, was born August 2005. He was removed from the Maryville group home where I stayed for two years. He was taken when I was 16 year old, during the year of 2006. DCFS came and took him. They took him to a place on Montrose Ave. a place for infants, girls and boys. The worst place a child can go. What happened when my son was taken from the group home was that they were accusing me of a lot of arguing, allegations of neglect and abuse. This was because the home we lived in didn't want me to have my son; they were trying to take a lot of our kids out of the home.

When DCFS came and took Evan they kept him from me for 8 years. That was a very hard time in my life. I felt lonely, rejected and miserable. During this period, I had to battle with depression and that emotion affected my self-esteem and progress in high school. My social life also was affected by this unfortunate situation. It took a lot of perseverance and faith to keep pushing myself through this time in my life. Although I didn’t always feel confident about the outcome, I continued to fight to regain custody of Evan.

It was very difficult to fight the allegations that were put on me. It felt like a game of chess. That I could not win. I still feel like the outcome was unlawful and if I could I would have continued to fight the judgment in higher levels of court. However, I really didn’t have enough money to keep up the fight. I tried to find a pro-bono lawyer to take my case, but they all wanted money and none of them could guarantee that I could get my son back. Even though there were errors in the case, since the state was both my representative and prosecuting the case against me. It was a no win case for me.  

Now I am trying to move on with my life. There is always a feeling of incompleteness that I struggle with. However, this situation continues to motivate me to become successful. I have come a long way despite this and other obstacles in my life. I have my own apartment, I have a second son, and I am focused on getting my education for my children and also for myself. This unfortunate situation didn’t break me down, it made me stronger and more determined to do and expect better things of myself. I will not let the decisions of others define my character or define what I turn out to be.

Takara

Don't Go to School with Your Friends

Being a student is a difficult, but important job because you are in school trying to get your education and doing all the things you need to do. The reason school is important is because you need to get the education you need in order to get a better job, so you won’t have to settle  for any job that’s not worth it. In the past, when I was in grammer school, I liked school because it was kind of easy and I always passed to the next grade. When I was in high school, it was kind of hard, because I knew a lot of people and every time I saw them we talked and they always interrupted me.

The reason they interrupted me was because every time we switched classes, and we saw each other in the hallway. One of my friends would find me, and then we would start talking and after we finish talking we would be somewhere else like in the bathroom or in the library ditching class. Then when the next class came around we would go to it and then it was time for lunch. We would go to lunch and then after we would go home and not come back to school.

When we did stay all day in school, we would have to turn around and fight because it was always like projects against projects. We were always into it with other projects. So we would have to fight other people if it wasn’t everyday it would be every other day. Then the police would come and break it up. They would have locks on chains or cans in a sock to hit you with. When we were out fighting somebody would get hurt and then some of us would get suspended.

When I got kicked out of school, this is what I had to overcome. I have learned my lesson by not going to the same school where I know a lot of people that go there that will interrupt me and get me in trouble. This experience has made me a better student by getting me back in school and continuing my education. So I can improve both for myself and for my child too. Now, I go to a school where I really don’t know anybody that can get me in trouble and interrupt me. I was working hard in school at first and then I fell off because I knew a lot of people. The thing that I learned from is to stay away from negative people that can distract you and stop you from doing what you are supposed to do instead of doing the wrong things. On the other hand, I can hang around positive people because I know they won’t distract me and get me to do the wrong things. They want me to do the right thing like going to school and continue to get my education and not let me miss any days of school.

You can learn from my experience, to be a better student, don’t go to the same school where you know a lot of people. Because if you do, they will distract you and you will not learn what you are supposed to learn. So you could get all the education you need, and you will become a better student.You will not miss any days because you will not know anyone at the school. So they won’t distract you. It is better to go to a school where your friends don’t attend to and you won’t have to worry about anybody distracting you.

Takeya

The Pythagorean Theorem

Being a good student is overcoming the difficult challenges you encounter.  As a student in Fast West, just like in life, I have encountered many challenges. The hardest struggle for me so far was learning how to do the Pythagorean Theorem.

Pythagorean Theorem was hard for me to learn at Fast West because the numbers became letters. So understanding the letters and where to put them was kind of hard to get at first. It took me a month to get it. By February, I had it down pat. With the help from my math teacher Mr. Ben and the time I spend at home studying, I achieved one of my small goals of learning the Pythagorean Theorem.

Pythagorean Theorem was very hard for me to understand. It was the first time I ever heard or saw something like that. So learning it was very challenging. For example, it’s hard to know when to put the number in for the letters or when to square root. It all goes back to knowing the basic math skills. Pythagorean Theorem is used as the same basic math skills I already knew. Even though it looked crazy, after Mr. Ben broke it down to me it was easy as multiplication. I’m a better student because I took the time to learn it even though it was hard. Now when I face something new and challenging I know I will be able to overcome it.

In the future, I will use my experience with Pythagorean Theorem to show my girls how to never back down from something challenging. If you ever run into a challenging math problem don’t go in to it thinking you can’t do it. Take a deep breath and remember you have the math skill to learn it.

               

              Pamela 

My First Best Friend I Ever Had

I did have a best friend. Her name was Shamara. I met her in the Rockwell Gardens (public housing complex). She was a friend that if I have a problem she was the one that I could come to. We hung out every day 24/7, and we would go out to party, club and out to dinner sometime. But when the state knocked down the building we started hanging out in her grandmother’s house. Her grandma was always asking her about me and my daughter, like if I’m all right or if I’m doing well. But when her grandma passed away, I couldn’t go to her funeral because I don’t do funerals; they make me have nightmares. But Shamara told her for me ever if she couldn’t hear her she knows that we care about her always.

I did not see Shamara ever since the state knocked down her grandma’s house, which was also part of Rockwell Gardens. She was staying on Chicago (Ave.) with her friends and I was on Kilpatrick (Ave.). I had started school, so we didn’t see each other very often.

Her friends always said that Shamara was looking for me, but I would never see her. I saw one of her friends that said she is staying with Shamara and I told the friend to give her my phone number and tell her to call me and she did. We met at the store two blocks from her house. We talked about what she was doing. She said she was going to school at Malcolm X to get her GED. We planned to get together the following weekend, and that was the last time I saw her alive.

The other day I saw her mother. She said, “You know my daughter got killed December first of 2013, two weeks before her birthday.” She said that Shamara was going with this boy that she knew on Chicago Ave, and she said some boys were out to kill him and he was her baby’s father. And that night she was walking with her boyfriend and he saw the boys and they saw him and they started to shoot him. He got shot in his leg and then he pulled Shamara in front of him and she got shot in the back. She was five months pregnant.

A lot of people came to her funeral, because she was a good person and she made her friend’s feel good about themselves. I wasn’t able to go to her funeral because I did not hear about it until I saw her mother two weeks ago.

Brenda

How I Met My Best Friend

My friend Kim and I became friends when we were 10 years old. Our parents introduced us over a family dinner. My mom told us to get ready to go to dinner. We got ready to head up north for our family dinner. It was out of the blue that we were going out to eat. When we got there, we were shocked to see that we were at somebody’s house. Mom said, “I would like for you to meet someone.” The person my mom introduced us to was her boyfriend Ira. Ira had 5 kids of his own there, one of whom was the same age as me. Her name was Kim. At first we didn’t get along at all because we were forced to be there.

Soon after that dinner, they were married. Kim and I were the same age, so once our parents were married, we were forced to play together, which made us dislike each other even more. We came up with a plan to break our parents up. The plan we came up with was for us to keep fighting every time we were around each other. We yelled, took each other’s stuff, hit each other, but our parents were like, “That’s what siblings do.”   

After a year, one weekend Kim came over crying because a girl from her school took her lunch money, and we sat in my room and talk about it. I was like, “you should’ve knocked her out.”

Kim said, “I told the teacher.”

“And what did the teacher do?” I said.

“Nothing,” Kim said. We laughed as we were coming up with plans to get the girl when she went back to school. As we sat there in my room laughing and joking, we realized we like a lot of the same stuff.

Over the next two years, Kim and I were glued to the hip. We even went to the same school in the eighth grade. Our plan never worked. It’s been over 20 years. Kim and I are still friends, and our parents are still going strong.

 As time went on, we became so close that at one point we were roommates. I had my daughter Jai and Kim was pregnant; we were loving our lives for a few months. Until I got pregnant with Jazzy, that’s when we went our separate ways. We went our separate ways because my kid’s father had asked me to marry him. Kim’s relationship was moving her away to North Chicago.

Today we are still friends. I am the godmother to her son, my baby boy, the son I always wanted. “Lol” Our kids still spend the summer together.  After 20 years, we can still call on each other and be right there for one another no matter what.

Pamela

Stopping the Generational Curse of Teenage Pregnancy in My Family

My story began when I noticed that my daughters were growing up to be young ladies. They didn’t look like the little girls that were jumping rope in the front yard. They were now 12,14 and 16; I knew I had to talk to my daughters about the changes in their bodies. I knew they might know some things about sex, but I wanted to make sure they heard it from me.

I was a working, single parent with six children total. Being a single parent has many challenges. That’s why I didn’t want my girls to have to go through that. I remember when I had my first child I was just 15!!! WOW, I was a freshman in high school trying to take care of an infant and continue high school. That was one of the hardest things I had to do. My parents would not help me at all. As I looked at my daughters a fear came over me that it could happen to one of them.  And because of me being a teenage MOM, I wasn’t going let my girls follow in my foot-steps.

I knew it would be hard to keep an eye on them 24 hours a day. By now I had two in high school and, where there are girls, there are BOYS. I had the mother daughter talk with them, but it seems that they didn’t take it too serious. My middle daughter would make statement that “I don't like those ugly boys.” What I had said to her went in one ear and out the other. There were a couple of girls that were friends of my two older girls that were pregnant; one of the girls was best friend to my oldest daughter. That made me a really mad woman. I was determined that my girls would not have children too early. I wanted them to finish high school and go to college. I would use threats and intimidation. It wasn’t nice is all I'm going to say.

I knew that eventually, that one day, one of them would meet some boy that they would like. Somehow I heard about this prevention program that parents would allow teens to pick up contraception after their parents have signed them up. Now I told them, “Just because you have protection doesn’t mean you are allowed to be having SEX.” I would still beat the ---------- out of them. After all my efforts, two of my daughters did get their high school diploma without having any children. I am very proud that my girls waited for the right time to have children.

They are all grown up and have their own children now. I just didn’t want them to struggle like I did having children too soon. 

Sheila

First Time Parent

A struggle I overcame, well to start, I never finished school. I dropped out in the 10^th grade young, dumb, and thinking that was cool. Why? I really don’t know, young love was something like amazing to me thinking someone really loves you.

Then you get pregnant and find out it wasn’t love, it was lust. Then for nine months you realize you’re really alone now, feeling kind of mad that you got pregnant and wishing then that you could start over. But it’s too late, now you have something growing inside of you. Knowing you are too young for this, but realizing it’s time to grow up. You’re having a baby. Sometimes you don’t want to acknowledge it, but when your stomach starts growing and something is moving around in you, that is really amazing.  You say to yourself, “I’m going to be a mother”.

I remember thinking, “What is this going to be like?” I would think about a pretty little girl and dressing her up. Then I remembered when my little sister was sick and she cried so much that I couldn’t stand it. She was very hot with a fever, and vomiting all over everything. I felt sorry for her and wanted to cuddle her up in my arms and stop her from crying and make her feel better. Then I thought, “That’s something a mother has to do!” And babies crying in the middle of the night and changing pampers, “OH MY GOD!” It was driving me crazy just thinking about it.

Now I’m nine months and very big, soon to have this baby.  I was getting scared thinking about being in labor. I was terrified because some of my friends started telling me about when they were in labor and what happened and how it hurt “WOW”. Two days later, I went in labor. My water broke and I had labor pains for eighteen minutes before I delivered a 9lbs 6ounce baby boy; it wasn’t as bad as people say. I’m not scared anymore. He’s here now, and I’m a mother.            

Tonie

My Friend Jessica

It’s amazing how some friendships are made. How a friend can have a big impact on your life. Like Jessica and I. We’ve been living near each other for about ten years, but we never met. Today, we are the best of friends. We have been for seven years now.

Our friendship is miraculous. How it became what it is today. I had seen her before, but yet we never met the whole time. We lived on the same block for a couple years. She stayed maybe six houses down from me. We attended the same elementary school. We both volunteered at Columbus Park. We even attended the same high school. We had mutual friends from both schools.

We finally met in high school, but not until the end of my sophomore year. We actually met outside of Michele Clark High School. My boyfriend (at the time) was her cousin. Jessica and I hung out with him and some other people a few times as a group. I am more into art and she was into partying. But, then she and I found common ground with music and family. That’s when our friendship begun!

The good thing about her, she helps me stay on track. I can be a tough cookie and hard to deal with. For instance, my attire, she helped me move from this boyish style to wearing dresses, heels and eyeliner. The very first time I wore a dress on my own was at the age of 16 ½. I never felt the need to look like a young lady. She indeed was a big impact on my life.  She helped me with school, daycare, and a job! She’s a shoulder to lean on and cry on. A person to talk with and chill to be girly girls. To tell my secrets, worries, dreams and funny things.

I am happy to have met Jessica. Who is Jessica? She is my best friend. She and I are crazy cool.  Dramatic, but who isn’t? She’s this and I’m that, but when you put us together were all that!

Tanyette

WRITING WAS NOT MY FRIEND

Writing is what I struggled with for a long time. I would avoid writing at any cost. I have made many excuses when it came down to writing. But when I started attending FAST west learning center, I only needed twenty points on the GED test. My focus at the time was only passing science; I did not have to write at all.

I am now starting over; I now have to take the whole exam over. I can’t avoid writing at all now. So one day in class Mr. Nathan said today we will be writing a narrative essay as soon I heard him say that right away I begin to say I can’t do it. So, he sat me down and encouraged me that I could do it. I sat there and sat there feeling defeated in my mind; unable to put the words in my head on paper. But guess what I surprised myself I was able to write my first essay, then another one and another one. I am ok with writing now. I am still learning.

I have overcome my writing block because there are such great teachers here at FAST west that will not let you give up on yourself and they do not give up either. They will sit with you explain step by step until you get. Now I can feel better when I am writing now and knowing that the test won’t be as hard as it seemed in the past. I can finely stop saying what I can’t do and just do it and not make any room for excuses. THANK YOU SO MUCH Mr. Nathan for believing in me.

 I didn't know that I had the ability to write.  With help and practice it has shown me that I can do anything. Only if you just try it and if you can’t figure it out, just ask for help and know you can overcome anything if you put your heart and mind to work. 

Gloria

A Friend in Need

I am the type of person that always helps out when someone needs me.

Just about two weeks ago, I helped out this girl named Shay. I bought her groceries when she didn’t have anything to eat. When I was shopping for me and my kids, I went shopping for her too.  I went to the grocery store and I told her I am going to bring her three bags back. So, I did because I felt like that she wanted me to and I was helping her out. When I told her that I’m going to bring her groceries, she was like “okay.” I helped out because I am that type of person. Later, she needed tissue, so I had to get her tissue, soap, as well. She has a job and receives child support, but it didn’t matter to me. Everyone is not the same, but after I was helping her I felt good about it because I would not like for any children or child to go hungry.

So, one day I was just testing her to see if she will help me out. So, I asked her can she bring me back some ground beef from the store, so I can cook some tacos. I remembered that she always eats at my house, so I didn’t think it was a big deal to ask her to bring back the ground beef. However, she came back from the store and told me she forgot the ground beef! I told her I didn’t need it because I had stared to cook the chicken anyway and she was like “okay.”

As I help out people, I look at it like it is a blessing. I had to tell her about it, “it is okay to help you out, but I cannot do it all the time.” She got mad and I did not care because I felt like she was using me and she knew it because she had her baby to ask me for something to eat. What I did was fix her baby something to eat at my house. Shay asked why didn’t I send it downstairs to her house and I told her I only looked out for the baby. And she got mad. So, now she doesn’t talk to me or call me. However, the important thing is that I felt good all the times when help her out.    

Nakevia