My grandmother was my care provider for nine years, because my
mother was always on drugs that played a big part in my life growing up. I was
a teen mom at the age of 15. My grandmother gave me up to DCFS at the age of 13.
I don’t have any family support that really cares about me and my son. I was
homeless for ten years, in my life. Going place to place, some nights I didn’t have
any food to eat. I slept in abandoned buildings, cold cars and even on the
train. No one really cared about me at all. I have always been alone to fight
all my battles. I never wanted any sympathy for my situation; I just wanted a support
system and love.
Evan, my first son, was born August 2005. He was removed
from the Maryville group home where I stayed for two years. He was taken when I
was 16 year old, during the year of 2006. DCFS came and took him. They took him
to a place on Montrose Ave. a place for infants, girls and boys. The worst
place a child can go. What happened when my son was taken from the group home was
that they were accusing me of a lot of arguing, allegations of neglect and
abuse. This was because the home we lived in didn't want me to have my son;
they were trying to take a lot of our kids out of the home.
When DCFS came and
took Evan they kept him from me for 8 years. That was a very hard time in my
life. I felt lonely, rejected and miserable. During this period, I had to
battle with depression and that emotion affected my self-esteem and progress in
high school. My social life also was affected by this unfortunate situation. It
took a lot of perseverance and faith to keep pushing myself through this time
in my life. Although I didn’t always feel confident about the outcome, I
continued to fight to regain custody of Evan.
It was very difficult to fight the allegations that were put
on me. It felt like a game of chess. That I could not win. I still feel like
the outcome was unlawful and if I could I would have continued to fight the
judgment in higher levels of court. However, I really didn’t have enough money
to keep up the fight. I tried to find a pro-bono lawyer to take my case, but
they all wanted money and none of them could guarantee that I could get my son
back. Even though there were errors in the case, since the state was both my
representative and prosecuting the case against me. It was a no win case for me.
Now I am trying to move on with my life. There is always a
feeling of incompleteness that I struggle with. However, this situation
continues to motivate me to become successful. I have come a long way despite
this and other obstacles in my life. I have my own apartment, I have a second
son, and I am focused on getting my education for my children and also for
myself. This unfortunate situation didn’t break me down, it made me stronger
and more determined to do and expect better things of myself. I will not let
the decisions of others define my character or define what I turn out to be.
Takara
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